How to increase newspaper readership

Most newspapers and TV news in the US are losing readers/audiences left and right mainly because they no longer control the news after Al Gore invented the internet. The ultra liberal views and biases of most "journalists" have not help their cause as well. Today's newspapers and TV "news" are too boring. I have better things to do than read liberal one sided "news" written by supposedly highly educated elitists in the New York Times or watch the ultra liberal twit Katie Couric pretend she is the best news anchor in the world.

Won't it be more interesting if the New York Times change their format and report news like these newspaper clippings from around the world (see below). May be it will stamp the tide and improve their ratings and readership. Read on...

A Chinese Whitney Houston?

Whitney's "I will always love you" is a very difficult song to sing because of the song's high notes. You got to have a good voice and be able to pelt out high octaves without breaking a wine glass to be able to play in Whitney's league. Meet Lin Yu Chun. He's a contestant on a Taiwanese talent show called 'Super Star Avenue' a show similar to 'American Idol." Chun performed a rendition of Whitney Houston’s song and I must say he is quite impressive. He's got talent...no doubt about it. However, I think he needs a professional hair cut and a liposuction.

Summer! Let's go to the beach!

WHAT THE...

DID I NOT TELL YOU TO COME EARLY!!!!!?

Questions:

Where the heck is Waldo?

If you fart, will any one know?

If you leak will anyone know?

If you strip, will the beach be less crowded or will you attract more crowd?

If you are a shark is this a potential feast or are you for once scared of humans?

If you're an eel or coral snake, would you swim between legs just to piss off the humans away from your play ground?

If all the people jump into the sea at once, will it cause a tsunami in Hawaii?

It's time to go if...

ocean life starts floating up to the surface

if your dog won't play in the water

if you panic every 5 minutes because you lose sight of your kids

you rather pee in the sea instead of lining up for two hours at the toilet

if the life guards won't go into the water

your boyfriend has wondering eyes and starts showing off his miniature assets

if your girlfriend is more popular than you

if your boyfriend tells you this is the best vacation he ever had

Credit: Not sure who to credit. These pictures came to me via email presumably a mass distribution circling the globe. The email claims it is a China beach but it looks like Chosun, Korea to me and not a beach in China.